Dazed and Confused

No More Fried Food!

Last week I went to the Malice Domestic mystery conference and the Festival of Mystery in Oakmont, PA.  That meant traveling.  Traveling seems to equal fried food. 

Why is it you can't get a decent meal on the road?  I swear, if I see another burger and fries any time soon, I'm going to have hysterics.

The big treat of the Malice Conference is the publisher-sponsored dinner at a very fancy restaurant.  The food is impeccable, but it's terribly rich.  We waddled away from the table.  The one time I actually got to eat healthy was breakfast at the hotel.  I ordered the world's worst oatmeal.  Adding raisins, milk, and even brown sugar didn't improve it.  One of my table mates ordered a continental breakfast which came with a HUGE bowl of granola.  It was only sprinkling the oatmeal with the granola that made it edible. Consequently, I was glad to get home and eat real food.  (Dorothy was right.  "There's no place like home!")

Speaking of real food, I came home with a few bags of author swag from the conference.  What's that got to do with food?  The Cozy Chicks are giving away their leftover swag (which is in my possession) to anyone who writes a review on Amazon or Barnes and Noble for their cookbook, The Cozy Chicks Kitchen.  (Each packet includes bookmarks from all the Cozy Chicks, plus a bonus recipe and adorable teapot cookie cutter.)  To get your swag, you must email the Chicks at cozychicks(at)gmail(dot)com and tell them where the review is posted.  Don't forget to include your snail mail address.

Since I've got author swag left over, too, I figured -- why not ask for the same thing.  Put up a review for my Victoria Square cookbook, Recipes To Die For, and email me at LLB(at)LLBartlett(dot)com and tell me where you posted the review and include your snail mail address. 

These cookbooks are filled with wonderful recipes -- the majority of which do not include food being immersed in cooking oil.  If you haven't tried them, maybe now you will.

No need to be carsick ever again!

All my life I have been afraid to read in the car because I'd get carsick.  I tried it a few times and became quite nauseous and got a splitting headache.

I made a trip to VA last month and decided to try Bonine.  I'd been told it was terrific to keeping one from getting carsick.  Since I REALLY needed to be working on the WIP (work in progress), and it's a l-o-n-g drive, I gave it a try.  It worked, hey, Mikey!  But it did make me terribly sleepy.  My friend, author (and retired nurse) Leann Sweeney said, "Try taking half a pill."  It still worked!  But I was still sleepy and didn't get as much work done as I'd hoped.  Back to the drawing board.

So, I have just returned from Bethesda, MD (Malice Domestic) and The Festival of Mystery (Oakmont, PA).  This time I decided to try Sea-Bands.  I was on a cruise in January and saw a LOT of people wearing these little cloth bracelets with a plastic bead embedded, pressing on a pressure point.  Guess what?  It worked fine!  I managed to edit my entire manuscript during the drive, and edit the first half of another project.

Weeee!  No longer will I have to be bored during long drives.  I can work, or read, and not have to worry about projectile vomiting.  I'd say that's a huge improvement.

Have you ever tried Sea-Bands?"

Staying on Budget is not easy

I had a very nasty surprise last fall.  My accountant told me I hadn't put enough money away to pay my taxes.  This year, I'm putting my tax money away first, which means I can't touch it.  It's in the savings account, and that's where it's going to stay until June 15th, September 15th, and for the school taxes due in September. 

So, this spring and summer I'm going to be living on a very tight budget.  Guess what?  Living on a tight budget really stinks.  I wanted to buy a new pair of jeans, but I remembered I was on a budget. I really want that new-to-me desk, and Saturday I was prepared to go out and find it.  But then I remembered I was on a budget. I wanted to get another David Arkenstone CD, but then I remembered I was on a budget.

But honestly, don't you have to splurge once in a while?

I was bad.  I splurged yesterday.  I've been thinking about this for years, and just never found what I wanted.  Well, last week a catalog came and there they were, the sheers of my dreams, and on sale, too.  So ... I ordered them.  Now I'm wondering what I'll live without once these sheers arrive and are hanging from my bedroom windows. I might only care when I'm away from those windows and think ... I could go out to lunch if I hadn't bought those sheers.  Or ... I could buy myself those jeans or that CD. 

Or I could just shut up and and think, I'm mostly living within my means and be satisfied.  (After all, that's what I've done most of my life.) 

That said, I have a feeling I won't be sorry about those sheers simply because they're pretty, they were such a good deal, and the sheers hanging from the window were really old and nearly in tatters. (Thank you, cats.)

So, what have you splurged on recently?

 

 

A desk, a desk--my kingdom for the right desk!

For the past three years, I've done the majority of my writing on my laptop on the dining room table.  It worked out well. Then it didn't.  So now I'm back to writing in my office, but ... the clutter is starting to get to me.

For the past ten or more years my computer desks (doesn't everyone have two?) have not been desks at all, but old farm tables.  One is lovely oak, the other is really shabby and not-so-chic.  (It was $8 at yard sale.)

A few weeks back, I visited my pal Ellery Adams (who writes  the Books By The Bay Mysteries, and soon the Charmed Pie Shoppe Mysteries, and she has an elegant antique desk.  No papers, pens, office supples (hand cream, nail polish, candy, hand sanitizer, multiple pairs of reading glases, Chapsticks in many flavors, paperclips, etc.) on her lovely desk.  And her office is immaculate, too.  Mine is full of junk.  But I'm working on it.  My comfy chair has actually been clear of stuff for more than a week!  I can actually sit in it once more to edit my work. (Real progress.)

But until I figure out what to do with all the junk on my work surface, the room is not going to get much tidier.  

I need a desk.  A real one.  With drawers.  And I wouldn't mind if it was shabby chic. What do you think of this one? 

or how about this one?

Incredibly cute, huh?  I could put ALL the junk that's currently on my farm table into the drawers.  I could have a clean surface to work.  I might even be able to address an envelope without having to run to the dining room table or kitchen counter.  Oh, wouldn't that be heaven?

The problem?  Try finding anything like this.  I've been on Craigslist and found mostly chipboard computer desks.  Been there, done that -- when I had no taste.  Now I want something girly and sweet.  And I don't want to spend a lot of money and I don't want to do it myself.  Boy, that kind of limits me, doesn't it?

What are you using for a home office desk?

The Not-So-Secret Garden

One of my favorite books is The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett.  I read it every year.  It's a wonderful story (except for the ending, where suddenly the heroine of the story gets lost and the focus completely turns on one of the secondary characters.  Ahem!).

In the book, a little girl, her friend (Dicken) with apparently magical relationships with animals, and the girl's cousin transform a badly neglected garden.  Dicken's animal friends are sweet, cute, and THEY DON'T EAT ALL THE PLANTS.

Unfortunately, the animals around my neighborhood, do.

This past winter was mild.  I had tried growing Brussels sprouts in containers to keep the groundhogs from eating them.  It worked, but they plants did not thrive.  In early September, I put the strongest plant in the garden to see if it would grow.  It didn't.  But it did survive the winter.  And then it took off like crazy!

Oh, what a thing of beauty.  We had a spate of warm temps last week and it shot up at least 12 inches.

And then Mr. Groundhog found it and ate EVERY SINGLE LEAF in about an hour.  We had planted out peas about 4 p.m.  An hour later Mr. G snuck into the garden and decimated the poor plant.  We set the haveahart trap out to try and catch him, but why should he return?  He's already eaten what he wanted, and apparently cabbage isn't as satisfying a dish as sprouts leaves.

Every year I'm heartbroken when all my veggies (and flowers) are attacked and eaten by critters.  Every year I hope it's going to be different.  It never is.

When you've got the gardening gene (and my parents were marvelous gardeners), it's something you do, but man is it heartbreaking at time.

Do you find gardening heartbreaking, too?

A product so good, I can't find it (locally)

It seems like every time I like something, it gets taken away.  We like to travel to Vermont.  Our favorite little motor inn ... sold, new owners, now terrible.  A wonderful restaurant in the same town?  Went out of business.

Ice Tea Gatoraid?  Gone.

The list could go on and on.

So I was thrilled a few months back when I found the Oxi-clean Gel Stick.  Spills happen, and I've tried just about everything on the market to get the stains out.  Nothing worked particularly well, and then I found this.  It even gets grease stains out (don't put it in the dryer--sometimes it takes two treatments).  I have saved a bunch of our clothes because of this little cylinder of cleaning gel.

And then I ran out.

I went to every grocery store in the area and NONE of them had it.  Finally, when I went to Virginia last month, I found some in a Martin's store, so I bought two.  Then I had a DOH! moment ... I'll bet I could buy it online.  It bites having to pay shipping, but I think in the long run it's for the best--if I want to keep our clothes nice, that is.  (And I could toss a few books or DVDs onto the order to get the free shipping, right?)

What product have you recently found that you LOVE and are terrified they are going to discontinue?

Pet Peeve Thursday: Cover That Cough!

Yesterday was grocery day!  Man, the people out there!  It's no wonder there are fears of a pandemic, because sick people are out shopping, getting their germy hands on the carts (I always use the cart wipes, and if they're out, slather the cart handle with my own Purell) and coughing, sneezing, and wheezing their way through stores and other public places. 

As I was walking around the veggie aisle, which my grocery store (Wegmans) has a beautiful way of displaying everything out in the open--making it look like an open air market, a man walked up to the lovely pile of onions COUGHED ON HIS HAND and then proceeded to pick through the entire lot before finally choosing one.

 As I left the store, a man had a coughing fit about 10 feet ahead of me.  That man never even covered his mouth with his hand, he just coughed into the air.

Is it just men who are incredibly rude, or people in general?  Haven't they gotten the memo that you're supposed to cough in your sleeve to avoid getting germs on your hands and spreading them far and wide?

I appreciate it that the store has a few Purell dispensers, but why is it only near the Pharmacy?  There are people hacking and coughing, sneezing and ... well, I know of one elderly woman who hasn't willingly washed her hands in decades, so you don't know WHAT kind of germs she's toting around.

And so I leave you with this small piece of advice:

And COVER THAT COUGH!

 

One Last Cover

And yesterday Mr. L finished updating the last cover.  Will this be for the last time?  Who knows.  Last week I Googled a title by one of my favorite authors and saw there had been TWELVE covers for that book over the past 30 years.  Some were better than others--some downright awful ... but every couple of years they rerelease the book and give it a new look.

And here's the new look for my Jeff Resnick story Bah! Humbug.

Same (partial) picture, different look.

What do you think about this one?

From This to That!

On Saturday, I posted on the Cozy Chicks Blog about how I'm updating my covers.  (AGAIN!  And you can see the first two there.)  As it turns out, I'm getting a teensy bit better at being an art director.  And Mr. L is getting a LOT better at doing the covers for my indie books.

Essentially, we decided (and mostly thanks to my pal Shelly Thacker) that my covers needed a more uniformed look.  I was more or less happy with some of the stock photography, but not with the fonts.  I'd also had a discussion about fonts and typesize a month or so ago with my good friend Pat Ryan, who is great at covers.  (She did the covers for my Jeff Resnick novels).

So, rather than go into more detail, why don't I just show you the results?

Abused -- A Daughter's Story:

 

Are You Lonely Tonight?

An Unconditional Love

 

Prisoner Of Love

And so, for a little market research.  (You guys get to play my focus group.)  So, what do you think of the changes?  Would you be more inclined to buy the stories with these new covers? 

Out Today: The Cat, The Wife and the Weapon

It's release day for the long-awaited fourth book in the Cats In Trouble Mysteries, by my good friend Leann Sweeney.

When quilter Jillian Hart returns to her lake house in Mercy, South Carolina, she discovered her friend, Tom, is missing-and his estranged half-brother has moved into Tom's house. Jillian doesn't trust the guy, especially since he allowed Tom's diabetic cat to escape. When police officers find Tom's wrecked car with a dead stranger inside, Jillian is determined to find out what happened to Tom-before someone else turns up dead.

You can by it from:

Amazon  ~  Barnes & Noble ~ Books A Million ~ Indie Bookstores

For:

Kindle ~ Nook ~ Sony E Reader ~ Kobo

If you've read the others, I know you'll enjoy it.  If you haven't they are:

The Cat, The Quilt and The Corpse
The Cat, The Professor and the Poison
The Cat, the Lady and the Liar

Enjoy!

I'll have mine with lemon

Earlier this year, when I was on vacation, I had a glass of water with every meal.  With lemon. I liked it. A lot.  So, when I came home, I thought ... I'd drink more water if it had lemon in it.

Wow--what a concept!

One of the reasons I haven't been drinking enough water is that after a while it seems to get "stale."  A flat, metalic taste.  Guess what?  Pour a BIG mug of water, toss in a lemon slice, and no more flat taste, even if it sits for an hour or more.

I've even got so I like hot water with just lemon in it.  And, I can use the same (thick) lemon slice all day.  I just keep refilling the cup.

Are you fully hydrated?

Something's watching me

Last winter, I was sitting in my usual spot on the black leather couch in my living room and happened to glance out of the sliding glass door that looks out on my neighbor's yard ... and was surprised to note that I was being watched.

Yes, that's a tree trunk.  A pine tree trunk.  Naturally the closer you get, the less it looks like a face.  So I backed up to take another shot.

And another.

Do you see the eyes, a nose,and a mouth, or am I just looney?  

It used to freak me out to see that face, which I can also see from my office window.  But now ... I'm rather comforted by it.  It looks after me and our home.  It's benign, possibly even friendly.  And I suppose it's no odder than seeing Mother Teresa in a cinnamon bun.

Have you ever seen a face in some inanimate object?

 

Pet Peeve Thursday: New Jersey ... love it or ... not?

by guest blogger Jeffrey Cohen

Political correctness--something with which I actually agree most of the time--dictates that we must no longer mock people based on race, creed, religion, national origin, or in some cases, appearance (apparently it's okay to keep making fun of fat people). But there are still a few commonly accepted targets, or at least some which an unwritten law has determined will not carry a penalty of outrage if you have some fun at their expense.

I belong to at least one of these (probably two, maybe three), and it was brought home to me pointedly recently when the Center for Public Integrity--not a body you'd normally think would be involved in a discussion of minority groups to mock--released a report on the various corruption levels in state governments, and found my home state at the positive end of the list. That is, we have the most transparent government in the country.

That's right, I live in New Jersey.

I'll give that a moment to sink in, because the "popular" opinion has always been that my home is a toxic waste dump run by Tonye Soprano. Not so, say the Center for Public Integrity, Public Radio International and Global Integrity. New Jersey has corrupt officials--no state in the union was given an "A" grade, you should know--but we are more efficient at rooting them out and dealing with them than most others, including the lowest-ranked members of the union, all of which were given an "F" grade: North Dakota, Michigan, South Carolina, Maine, Virginia, Wyoming, South Dakota and Georgia.

New Jersey got a "B+," the highest grade in the 50 states, and the only state to get one. Suck on that, Idaho!

Of course, the coverage given this report was condescending. CBSNews.com ran a headline that began with "Fuggetaboudit," which I have never heard anyone from my state say (we don't call it "Joisey," either--that was made up by vicious Brooklynites). Even "Wait Wait Don't Tell Me," the normally amusing quiz show on NPR, lambasted panel member Mo Rocca for even suggesting that he likes New Jersey. How could such a thing be true? How can you like a place where 8-million people choose to live their lives, which has among the highest levels of education in the country, which includes a shoreline that people (unfortunately, some like Snooki, who isn't from New Jersey) come to vacation every year? Yeah, the place must be a dump.

In my short time living here (half a century, after all, is not even a blink compared to, say, eternity), I have experienced the beach--many times--Pine Barrens, theater, film, literature, mountains, lakes, music, art, great food, lousy (but delicious) food, drive-in movies (alas, no more), fine education--chiefly at the state university--amusement parks, quiet parks, Van Dyke Parks, investigative journalism, scenic bike rides, lazy Sunday drives, boardwalks, moonwalks, long walks and bookstores. I could go gambling in Atlantic City, but that's really not my thing. Could go skiing, but that would involve being outside in the winter, and I don't understand people who do such things willingly. I'm sure I could go SCUBA diving, too, but I prefer breathing air without having to take it with me.

All those things are possible in New Jersey. And we have some great mystery writers and mystery writers who use us for background. I'll name none of them in fear of leaving good ones out.

So do we get respect? Hell no. We're the Rodney Dangerfield of states. We come out as the least corrupt state in the union, and get ridiculed for it.

But you know what? We'll chuckle at your little jokes and we'll smile tolerantly when you tell us all you know about where we live (which is generally not much). Go ahead and have your fun; we can take it. We're from New Jersey.

Watch out for those North and South Dakotans, though. We have proof now that they're not as trustworthy as they seem.
======================
Jeffrey Cohen is the author of the Double Feature and Aaron Tucker mystery series. The Aaron Tucker short story THE GUN ALSO RISES has been nominated for the Derringer Award and the Barry Award. You can read it for free here: http://www.deadlypleasures.com/BarrySS22012.html

My love affair with Bic

When I was a kid, the first pen I owned was a Bic.  I thought it was marvelous! No longer was I relegated to writing homework assignments with a lowly No. 2 pencil.  I was practically an adult because I had learned cursive and I was writing with a PEN!

Back in the day, Bic pens were only available (to me at least) in blue or black.  I always chose blue.  I like the color blue.  It's the color of my eyes.  The color of the sky.  It's nice, friendly.  Black is a little too business like for my taste.  I like things nice and friendly.

As I mentioned in another post, I've been using Bic pens a lot lately, because I seem to be doing a lot of my (novel) writing by longhand, and then later typing up my pages.  For Christmas, Mr. L slipped into my Christmas stocking a package of blue Bic pens AND a package of red ones, too.

Red pens have POWER.  School assignments were always marked with a red pen.  For years I edited with a red pen.  But now ... eh, I found it's harder to see the red ink than the blue.  (And I don't like the implications, either.)  So the package of red pens still has 9 in it, while the blue package is empty.  Those pens are scattered around the house--any where I might need to pick one up and immediately start writing.

Bic pens come in green, too, but I haven't seen any of them around in years.  : (

The do come in other colors, and maybe it's just me, but I haven't found them to work as well as the plain old blue ones, mores the pity.

What product have you fallen in love with lately?  (Or rekindle your love affair with?)

It's that time of year ... PAYDAY!

There's a reason a lot of authors have put their older works up on Kindle, Nook, and other e reader platforms.  It's called Payday.  You see, Amazon and Barnes and Noble pay on a monthly basis.  Okay, they're paying you for what you sold two months ago, but the point is you're getting a check (or in my case, a direct deposit) every month.  (Smashwords pays every three months.)

Believe it or not, I use that money to live on.  And why is that?  Because the publisher for my mass market paperback books (think the Booktown and Victoria Square Mysteries) only pays me twice a year.  Yes, you heard that right.  I get paid sometime in April and sometime in October.  And so does everyone else with traditionally published books.

It's hard to budget when you have no idea when you're going to get paid for your work -- or how much you will make.  Because I'm very numbers oriented, I keep track of my Kindle and Nook sales so I can budget ahead.  This month we've got our healthcare insurance premium.  It will take my entire month's pay to cover that one bill.  Meanwhile, we'll be eating a lot of  Macaroni & Cheese during the next couple of weeks.

On Friday, I got a royalty check for the audio edition of Murder On The Mind, my first Jeff Resnick mystery.  A whopping $11.57.  Still, I'm grateful for it.  (I'd be a lot MORE grateful if people would discover this edition of the book.  Then maybe they'd buy the rights to the other books in the series and I could have a cavity filled once in a while.)

In two weeks, I have to pay my estimated taxes.  Holy smoke!  Where is that money going to come from?  Kitchen refit?  On hold indefinitely.  Why?  Being an author, I have to pay estimated taxes every three months.  Plus, in September, I have to pay the town school taxes (that same month we have to pay for healthcare AGAIN.  I have to pay county taxes in January--right after the December *%#@ health care premium).  It's never ending.  And you know I'll be praying to see that check arrive in the mail--SOMETIME before April 15th--praying it will cover the June and September estimated taxes, too.

It's not likely the big publishing houses will ever pay their authors on a more timely basis.  So in between we either live in luxury (for usually one month of the year--October) or like paupers (for the other 11 months).  So if you thought that all authors are raking in the dough, like Stephen King, Nora Roberts, or Janet Evanovich, think again. 

BTW, anybody got tips for budgeting?

Car Trip

So, last week I went to Virginia to not only visit my good buddy Ellery Adams, but to do a signing at the Short Pump Barnes & Noble in Richmond, but also to participate in a cozy mystery panel at the Virginia Festival of the book.  Both events were terrific.  I met a lot of new readers, and did many drop-in signings at bookstores in the area.  (We were pooped!)

Since I don't fly, we drove to Virginia. Losing a few days of work was out of the question, so I needed to be able to write during the journey.  The problem is, I get carsick if I try to read. I decided to give Over The Counter Medicine a try. 

Can you say Bonine Motion Sickness Protection to the rescue?

I'm very pleased to say that the Bonine worked great.  Okay, I was writing longhand but I managed to get quite a bit of work done on the next Booktown Mystery.  The down side?  I was pretty sleepy.  But I got more work done with the Bonine than I would have without it.

Do you get motion sickness, and if so--what do you use.  (Anyone try those Sea-Bands?)

===============================================

P.S.  BTW, if you're heading to Malice Domestic and want to buy a trade paperback copy of The Cozy Chicks Kitchen (our delightful new cookbook), let us know NOW. We're taking advance orders but will ONLY BRING COPIES FOR THOSE WHO RESERVE THEM in advance. We'll be ordering them this week. You'll save a dollar off the cover price and won't have to pay for shipping! Additionally, six of the Chicks will be at the conference and would be glad to sign your copy!  (If you're going to the Festival of Mystery in Oakmont, PA -- you can pick one up there, too!)

Just send an email with the subject line of COOKBOOK OFFER to us at cozychicks(at)gmail(dot)com and we'll make sure you can pick up your copy at the conference.

Remember, we're only bringing enough copies for those who reserve in advance.

Happy cooking!

It's so cozy (and tasty)!

For those who don't know, I'm a member of the Cozy Chicks blog and I post on Saturdays.

We're like-minded cozy mystery writers who've banded together to talk about our lives, our writing, and ... food.  As it happens, we all love to eat (and it shows more on some of us than others).  With that in mind, we decided to put together The Cozy Chicks Kitchen, a collection of killer recipes.

We had such fun picking out a title, a cover picture, and collecting more than 100 recipes--some written by us, some "written" by our characters--and let me tell you, mouthwatering?  You better believe it!

In fact, that's just how Julie Hyzy, author of the White House Chef and the Manor House Mysteries put it.  She said:  "THE COZY CHICKS KITCHEN is chock full of mouthwatering gems. Everything is here: main dishes, desserts, salads, soups, drinks, and did I mention desserts? Don’t miss this fabulous collection. I’ve got both the ebook version and a hardcopy. Get yours today!"

The ebook edition is now available, but fear not--the trade paperback is in the works and will be ready in the next 2-3 weeks.  I'll let you know when it comes out.  But for now, if you've got an e reader you can find it for: 

Kindle  ~  Nook  ~ and for all other ereaders at Smashwords.

We hope you enjoy meeting and eating with us and our characters!

Pet Peeve Thursday: May You Live In Interesting Times

by guest blogger Lillian Stewart Carl

As old Chinese curses go, “May you live in interesting times” is less dire than some, even when you take “interesting” as a euphemism for “uncertain” or even “chaotic”.

The corollary that brings the curse home is, “May you live in interesting times—and have those times in your face 24/7.”

Recently I read a brief article (are there long, in-depth articles any more?) saying that younger people who’ve grown up with the multiple distractions of the electronic age are not as stressed by the constant look at me! over here! whiplash as older ones. Like me, for example. Heck, when I was a kid our television set got only two channels, both of which closed down at ten pm. (And I had to walk uphill both ways just to change channels.)

I’m not saying those days were better than these. In many significant ways, they weren’t. I’m saying I feel as though I’m now living in the Era of Attention Deficit. In the Age of En-lite-enment.

Exhibit A: Why do so many places I go have to have a television set mounted on the wall?

A sports bar, yes. People come there to watch the game with their friends. No problem—I can avoid sports bars. It’s the televisions in ordinary restaurants that annoy me. There you are, trying to have a pleasant lunch with your friends, while just above your head politicians foam at the mouth and disasters play out in excruciating slo-mo. Those televisions are like electronic swords of Damocles.

My hairdressing salon recently installed a television playing home, garden, and cooking shows, much better than one playing the news—or worse, opinion clothed as news. Still, it’s noise pollution. It’s that constant urgent movement in the corner of your eye.

And, so help me, doctor’s offices also have televisions. Your blood pressure might be just fine when you sit down in the waiting room, but it will be sky-high after half an hour bombarded with interesting times—all brought to you by companies whose commercials use every trick in the sound-and-light book to get your attention.

Over here! Look at me! Voices! Music! Bright moving colors!

And then there’s Exhibit B: When I do, on purpose, turn on the news, that’s what I want. I don’t want what seems like ten minutes of the anchors chatting and teasing: “Which dress did you like best at the Academy Awards?”Or “Oooh, here’s a tape of you in 1989! Look at that hairdo!” Recently our favorite local station featured an interminable segment in which the anchorwoman played video clips of her dog snoring.

Seriously.

It’s a relief to change the channel to PBS, which still believes in presenting information in a sober, non-confrontational fashion. (No, information does not equal wisdom. But that’s another issue.) I don’t know whether Gwen Ifill or Ray Saurez has a pet. It doesn’t matter whether they do or not. Their pets aren’t anchoring a news program. Neither do I want the anchors reading off to me the tweeted or Facebook’d opinions of viewers. I want professional presentation and knowledgeable analysis.

This brings me to Exhibit C:

Our local dead-tree newspaper is so marginalized these days that they’ve not only cut themselves back to little more than a pamphlet, they seem to have fired most of their writers and are now letting the remaining readers write the news for them.

We have one and sometimes two entire pages devoted to readers’ often knee-jerk reactions—not letters to the editor, but sound-bite tweets, “cheers and jeers”, and Facebook-style comments designed, I suppose, to appeal to those with the attention span of a two-year-old. Who aren’t reading the newspaper anyway.

I’m an adult, and I want to read news. Not “features” including large photos of lawn furniture or craft projects, seemingly included to fill space. A couple of years ago, so help me, the newspaper spent an entire week on “help Julie choose a prom dress”. This meant a full page every day with photos of Julie modeling a gown, or shoes, or flowers, so that readers could vote on which they liked best.
I repeat. Seriously?

I know, I know, it’s all hard economic reality. The newspaper is trying desperately to appeal to people who spend all day focused on their smart phones and tablets, picking up an image here, a few words there. The restaurants and offices are afraid if they don’t provide their patrons with moving images and chattering voices, they’ll go elsewhere. We live in an age when flash and charisma is more important than substance, because that’s what sells television shows, newspapers, music videos, apps—you name it.

My tai chi instructor tells me that sitting and meditating, or concentrating on the flowing motions of the form, is difficult because—as the old Chinese masters used to say—the human mind is like a monkey dancing on a hot griddle. It was probably those same old Chinese who uttered the “interesting times” curse.

Hey! Over here! Look at me!
========================
Lillian Stewart Carl has published multiple novels and multiple short stories in multiple genres, sometimes straight up mystery or fantasy, but usually blended, with nuts. Her most recent novel is The Mortsafe, set in Edinburgh. All her books can be found through Backlist eBooks.  And speaking of which, Lillian has a story (The Avalon Psalter) in the Backlist eBooks anthology Tales from the Backlist.

Kiss Christmas good-bye . . .

Last night, I took down the last of Christmas.

For the first time since we were able to furnish our HUGE combination living/family room, we put up a small part of our Snow Village display.  When we had no furniture, our Snow Village took up a big part of one wall.  However, about six years ago, we finally filled in all the gaping holes. (And don't ask why one home with only two people needs to have five living room spaces--PLEASE--just don't ask!)

I'd been meaning to put the village pieces away for weeks--nay, months--but time is a precious commodity around here.  Still, last night I felt that it was finally long past time.

The weather is great, so who wants to think about snow and Snow Village?  So, now we're back to our regular decorating mode and anticipating a long, hot summer.

And right about now, doesn't that sound WONDERFUL?

The hurrier I go . . .

Did it ever seem to you that life is getting away from you because you do too much ...?

I had a few days off at the end of January and came home refreshed and raring to go.  No sooner had I returned when I was feeling pretty burned out. I'm still feeling pretty burned out and I'm not getting nearly enough written.  While I was gone, I wrote up a storm.  Since I got home ... not so much.

And now our garbage men have decided to change the time they pick up our trash.  They used to come at 3 pm.  Suddenly, they come before 7.  We didn't figure that out for TWO WEEKS.  That's a lot of trash piling up.

My energy efficient washing machine doesn't clean our clothes very well.  And although I use liquid detergent that's made for dark clothes, my dark clothes come out with white spots that look like undissolved powdered detergent.  I have to wash them over again and hope that the next time it's something else that comes out with the white spots.  I'm ready to trash this machine and buy a non-energy efficient machine just so I don't have to keep washing my clothes over and over again so I can actually wear them.

What are we supposed to do with finicky cats?  Since we lost our Bonnie back in November, we still put the same amount of wet cat food down for each kitty meal.  Why?  Because they won't eat something that sat in the fridge.  Most days they won't eat the fresh stuff, either.  All three show up, but at least two of them sniff the food and walk away.  It's insulting when you've gone to all that trouble to open the can, scrape out all the gravy (because that's all they really want anyway), put it in clean bowls, set it on the floor and then fill the water dishes (which they won't drink out of--they prefer the dripping bathroom sink).

The list goes on and on.

What's getting in the way of you enjoying life?

Oh, the mail I get ...

Oh the mail I get ... I think that's a standard title for one of Lee Goldberg's regular topics on his blog, (which I read religiously).  He usually gets mail from someone asking an outrageous favor (like, here I am a COMPLETE stranger--please drop everything and help me promote my book.... (oh, yeah.  I got one of those last week, too), or a nasty fan (?) letter (I also got one of those last week).

The other day I got a note from a reader saying:  "In 'Sentenced to Death' Angelica makes puppodums in the microwave. I've never heard of these, but when I looked them up no one seems to make them in the microwave."

Well, I do!  Okay, the instructions say you're supposed to fry them in a skillet ... or something like that. Fuggetaboutit!  Who has time? And who wants to clean an oily skillet when God gave us microwaves to make our lives easier?

It took a couple of years of trial and error (hey, I've been busy writing books and stuff!), but I've now got it down to a science and I am happy to share my secret with the rest of the world. (Hold your applause until the end of this post.  Thank you.)

First of all, I had to experiment with the timing.  Too long and they burn to a crisp.  Not long enough and they're horrible.  And never try to cook a puppodoum in the microwave if you line your glass plate with paper towel.  Either that, or stand by with a fire extinguisher.

I found the best way to cook puppodums was on a Syracuse China plate.  (Any heavy duty restaurant plate will do, I just happen to collect their Americana pattern.)  I found this dinky plate, and it's brother, at a yard sale.  (Yeah, I could go to Replacements.com and buy the entire set for a gazillion dollars, but I prefer the thrill of the yard-sale hunt.) 

Next up, preparing the puppodum.  I squirt mine with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray. (I used to use the garlic version, but because I liked it they discontinued it.  Product manufacturers always discontinue something the minute I decide to use it.  Good thing I don't buy Oreos, huh?)  You can use any cooking spray, like PAM, as well.  After three or four squirts, I use my finger and distribute the ICBINB to evenly coat the puppodum.  I place it on the little plate, and into the microwave it goes. 

BTW, I have no idea what my microwave wattage is, and must admit I really don't care.  This microwave takes 45 seconds to cook the puppodum to perfection.  (It takes a lot less if you just toss it on the glass plate inside your microwave--about 20-22 seconds, but as I mentioned, sometimes they burn. The heavy china must distribute the heat better.  That's my story and I'm sticking with it.)  If this seems like a l-o-n-g time, you can do something else while you wait.  I like to drink a glass of skim milk when I eat curry, so usually my lunch is ready (today I'm thinking of having MTR alu muttar on rice) and too hot to eat anyway (did I mention I like my food PIPING HOT?), so 45 seconds is more than enough time to pour a glass of your favorite beverage.

The end result may look like a dinosaur scab, but it tastes just fine.  (If you like lental flatbread, that is.)

So there you have it:  puppodums cooked in the microwave.

(It's okay to applaud now.)

I love answering questions about my books and, quite honestly, rarely get them.  So if you've wondered about anything in the books--please, ask away.  (It's hard coming up with new ideas for blog posts.)

 

 

Pet Peeve Thursday: No tonsil-tickling on the first date

by guest blogger Phoebe Conn

When Lorraine requested pet peeves, I offered one she hadn't heard before.

I'm single and date whenever the opportunity appears.  I'd had dinner with a nice man and when we came back to my home, he gave me one of those tonsil-tickling kisses that made me want to shriek the way Lucy does when Snoopy licks her check.  Some men have absolutely no idea how to kiss a woman.  They dive for it like a sailor who's spent the last year in a submarine under a polar ice cap.  Makes me want to puke!  Fortunately, I have a strong stomach.

The gentleman in question had eaten a roast beef sandwich for dinner.  I can feel your shuddering from here. Yes, the flavor of that sandwich added immeasurably to the sheer awfulness of that devouring kiss.  Being a lady, I smiled rather than grimace, and asked him to slow down a bit.  He looked confused, soon left, and, thank goodness, I've not heard from him since.

I much prefer a man who gives slow teasing kisses that build from a tender touch to the volcanic.  I should have sent my date a copy of one of my books where the heroes all know how to kiss like they mean it without the revolting tongue jab.

Excuse me, I need to go check my messages, someone interesting may have called.
_____________________________
Romance author Phoebe Conn has over thirty books to her credit.  Her latest Fierce Love will be available on May 22nd. In the meantime, why not sample one of Phoebie's short stories, PLAYING FOR KEEPS, in the Backlist eBooks anthology, Tales from the Backlist: Select Stories from Backlist eBooks Authors. (It's on sale for a limited time for just 99 cents.  P.S.  My short Jeff Resnick story, COLD CASE, is also included in the anthology.)

What should I do with those gift cards?

They're the gifts you give when you don't know what to give:  Money and/or gift cards.

Right now, I've got a couple of Amazon gift cards sitting there and I haven't decided what to do with them.  Or rather, I've decided that I should buy some movies, but I'm not sure what.

I got to see about half an hour of Pay It Forward over the weekend, and I was intrigued enough that I'd like to see it again, so that's a given. (I like uplifting movies.)

When the movie was new, I thought about going to see Up, but never got around to it.  It stars the voice of Edward Asner. I met Mr. Asner's sister in January, and since then I've thought ... I should buy that DVD.  (Although what one has to do with the other ... is anyone's guess.)

I'm fascinated with time-travel stories (hmmm...it's a wonder I haven't read any time travel romances--there seem to be a lot of them around), and it's been years since I've seen The Final Countdown, so that's on the list, too.

I've thought about buying Ladyhawke, since I seem to be collecting most of the work of director Richard Donner, but I'm not sure.  (If you've seen it, what did you think?)

I figure I've got enough Amazon $$$ left for two more movies.  I usually prefer comedies, but as you can see, I've got two (almost three) dramas on my wish list.

What older movies have you seen that you love ... that you think I'd love, too?

Pet Peeve Thursday:

By guest blogger E.J. Copperman

A car commercial aired during the Oscar telecast Sunday night that just got on my nerves. What better forum to discuss it than in my dear friend Lorraine’s Pet Peeve Thursday?

This particular ad, directed by the filmmaker Wes Anderson (who has made a lot of films I didn’t especially like, either), depicts a suburban dad doing his very best—which isn’t very good—to make dinner while getting instructions via the phone from his wife, who makes a comment about the “bumper-to-bumper” traffic. Around this poor schlemiel, some strange pudding-type substance is erupting on a table, children are rushing around trying to help, refrigerator magnets are dropping off like dead flies and a small child is eating frozen french fries. That are still frozen.

The beaten-down yutz whines to his wife, “Just hurry. Please.” She, meanwhile, is out in the driveway of their home, luxuriating in the automobile in question, whose manufacturer shall remain nameless (Hyundai), while Jeff Bridges’s voice asks, “Did we make it too comfortable?”

Stick it in your ear, Jeff.

While first of all trying to sell us on the idea that a car so fabulous (and made in the Korea we like) is an excuse to ditch your spouse and ignore your children, the commercial demeans women. By suggesting—as so many such ads do—that men are incapable of keeping a household from falling to pieces on their own, it blatantly insults the male gender.

I’m not a big fan of generalization. I bristle whenever someone starts a sentence with, “Women all…” or “You know, men always…”. People are individuals. This is the gender equivalent of an ethnic joke, and we know how much good THOSE do.

Still, here’s one that I think is funny, because it really doesn’t demean anyone:

http://www.jumbojoke.com/the_worst_ethnic_joke_ever_told.html

I’m just saying: The next time you see a depiction of a man who can’t put together a pasta dinner without instructions from his wife, or a woman who simply couldn’t manage to get the garbage taken out without some brawny guy to help, consider that many of the world’s greatest chefs are men and there are female Marines who can kick your butt from here to Iwo Jima.

Don’t accept such views. Don’t ignore them. But do notice them, and complain. Because that’s how you get stuff to stop.
================
E.J. Copperman is the author of the Haunted Guesthouse Mystery series, recently continued with OLD HAUNTS. You can find out more about E.J.—whose last name is NOT “Cooperman”—at www.ejcopperman.com

Skype Me!

A couple of months ago, a librarian asked me to talk to her library group about the Booktown Mysteries.  The only thing was, they were out of state.  What's a person to do?

Skype!

For several years, I've offered to talk to reader groups via Skype, and no one has taken me up on it.  I kind of forgot about it, so it was a bit of a shock when I got approached to talk to the group in February.  The day they were meeting, I was scheduled to be out of town.  I didn't want to take a chance on iffy Internet connections, so we reschdeuled for this week.

This week is here.

I didn't have Skype, either.

I do now.  And thanks to my pals, Ellery Adams and Julie Hyzy, I tested it and had two very nice long-distance discussions, and I got to see my friends, who I haven't seen since last April.  Weeee!  This is fun!

Now the real test comes on Friday when I fire up my laptop and talk to that library group.  Gulp!  I'm off to go get beautiful!

Do you use Skype or a service like it?

Who does this remind you of?

Hauled out the suitcase ... getting ready for my trip to Charlottesville, Virginia next month and the Virginia Festival of the Book.  Uh-oh ... who (what?) does my suitcase remind me of?

If my book was made into a movie ...

Okay, I did NOT see any of the films in this year's Oscar race.  Not one.  I heard about all of them.  I saw clips on all of them (even three of the short features), but time to go to the movies?  Fuggetaboutit! I didn't even get to see the last Harry Potter on the big screen.  I was busy writing. (The last movie I went to see was The King's Speech.  It was good!)

But last night I had a bit of a fun time on Facebook.  I posted that I thought it would be cool if one of my books made it to the movies, and I picked Murder on The Mind, the first Jeff Resnick book.  One of my readers suggested one of the Booktowns would make a good movie, but while my readers might be happy, the coveted 18-49 male demographic would never tear themselves away from their video games and Youtube to make it to the theater.  (But they'd probably do really well on TV. How about the Hallmark Channel?)

Someone suggested that Bradley Cooper play Jeff Resnick, the hero of Murder On The Mind (and the rest of the series).  I must confess, I never even heard of Bradley Cooper. (Writers don't get out that much.  I mean, I make it to the grocery store once a week, and that's about it.)  I looked him up on Google images and -- hot damn, he's good looking.  He's got mesmerizing blue eyes.  Jeff has muddy brown eyes.  I think I could overlook that tiny imperfection in the actor.

I've always thought that Phillip Seymour Hoffman would be terrific as Richard.  (He'd have to dye his hair brown -- but actors do that a lot.  Maybe he could lose a few pounds, too.  Couldn't we all--or at least a bunch of us--do with that, too?) The fact that Mr. Hoffman is a Rochester, NY Native (okay, Pittsford--let's not quibble) would make it even better!

From the first time I saw Jennifer Hudson (and I don't even remember where that was), I thought she'd make a terrific Brenda.  (She doesn't have to sing for the role!)  Can't you just picture her bossing Richard and Jeff around?

I haven't given much thought as to who could play Maggie.  When I picture her as I'm writing the character, it's Gates McFadden I see, but she's too old for the part now.  Still, 15 years ago, she would have made a fabulous Maggie.

Is there a chance in hell this book would be made into a movie?  Well, a production company did request a copy -- but they never optioned it.  (I have a friend who's had a book optioned.  So far ... no movie.  But they keep renewing the option, so there is hope.)  Of course if you know someone at a production company, hey--mention Jeff's name, willya?

So, what do you think about my casting?  Disagree?  Who do you see playing the major roles?

 

 

It's TRYING to be spring

The other day it snowed overnight.  (Is that an oxymoron?  Anyway, it did.)  The snow was the wet, heavy spring type snow.  And it melted by lunchtime.

The daffodils are up by several inches.  Now we're waiting for the snowdrops.

It's been a mild winter, but it's still winter.  I'm ready for warm weather.  Zephyr breezes.  Planting my snow peas (and I'll do it on time, this year).

I'm ready for spring.  How about you?

Pet Peeve Thursday: Cross the Line – I Dare Ya

by guest blogger Kelly McClymer

I started reading with Dick and Jane. Kids today have many more colorful options, but Dick and Jane gave a big advantage to this budding book lover: they made everything else I ever read seem interesting and fun. I felt there was no boundary too far to run from Dick and Jane. And Spot. Mars? Sounds like a grand time. A little house on the prairie? I’m there. A windswept Prince Edward Island in the early 1900s? Sign me up. Narnia, or a time warp? Oh yeah.

Which brings me to my pet peeve (thanks, Lorraine, for letting me vent today): people who are afraid to cross genre lines. They make seemingly reasonable statements like, “I only read cozies.” Or romance. Or thrillers. Or Oprah picks. Or more inflammatory statements like, “Romance is brain fluff.” or “Science fiction is about ideas and I like books about people.” In some quarters, them’s fighting words.
 
Sometimes I wonder if I may have been afraid to cross genre lines at some point if my parents had not bemusedly encouraged my vacuum-cleaner-like book choices (start at the beginning of one library shelf, and work my way across, down to the next shelf, and the next, and the …). That kind of reading history inoculated me from believing any common genre prejudice.

Science fiction is not about people? Of course it is. I knew that because I ran across John Brunner’s classic The Sheep Look Up on my uncle’s living room end table when I was 12. That book is all about people, and science (and how corporate greed is toxic to the people – and it was written in the 70s).

Romance is brain fluff? Snort. I’ve been married for over 3 decades, and there’s many a romance (and a few science fiction, mystery, thrillers and fantasies) that’s helped me through the minefield of the romantic relationship many a time – and entertained me along the way.

Fiction gives me insight into human beings (even when they’re disguised as robots or vampires). I need that insight, because – as I discovered while raising a son on the autism spectrum – I’m really not good at picking up people clues in the real world.

I’m proud to say I’ve never met a genre line I was afraid to cross. Some I like more than others, but every genre out there offers me some new perspective on people, life, living, and myself.

Which brings me to my secondary pet peeve: publishers’ fear of genre mixing in anthologies. When you find an anthology, it usually has similar genre stories (maybe a publisher will be daring and mix in some romantic mystery, history, suspense…maybe). But usually they stick stories into same genre boxes.

At Backlist Ebooks, we thought outside the genre box for our anthology of backlist tales. Our stories cross all the lines: mystery, suspense, science fiction, fantasy, contemporary, horror, you name it. After all, our authors have backlists in multiple genres. Many of our individual authors cross genre lines within their own backlist. I write historical romance, science fiction, YA (fantasy and contemporary humor), and whatever else strikes my fancy.

HTML

This anthology, Tales From the Backlist, is a work of hope by the members of Backlist Ebooks. We want to support our fledgling backlist author platform. And we hope that readers may dare to cross a genre line or two and find a new genre playground or two that satisfies the reading itch. Take a chance and cross the genre line with our short stories. I dare ya.
+++++++++++++++++++++++
Kelly McClymer has one foot in traditional publishing, with her YA series The Salem Witch Tryouts, and one foot in the indie publishing world, with her backlist Once Upon a Wedding historical romance series. To scramble things up further, her Tales from the Backlist story "Diapers, DIshes, and Demons" is a literary fantasy about a woman for whom post-partum depression is a very real -- and annoying -- demon. You can find Kelly at her website http://kellymcclymer.com, on Twitter, and on Facebook.

 (P.S. Lorraine has a story in Tales from the Backlist, too.  It's my Jeff Resnick story, COLD CASE.)

Tax Time

Don't you just LOVE to spend hours pouring over a spreadsheet adding up each and every trip to the post office, counting the miles AND the postage?  Well, that's how I spent yesterday.  I spent nearly $3,000 in postage in 2011, and will probably spend as much if not more in 2012.  All part of my job of promoting my books.

But that's not a beef.  Honest.  And it really didn't take all that long yesterday because my figures, when broken out, added up with the total at the bottom of the spreadsheet.  Usually I screw up with my formulas and have to go over the figures time and again.  Yesterday?  Not at all.  But then I realized there were missing items.  Like my new keyboard.  I couldn't find the receipt and I couldn't find item listed on my Visa bill (because I couldn't remember the date I bought it).  So ... that didn't get counted.  I know there were others, and I try to be meticulous about keeping receipts and adding the totals to my spreadsheet. Must try harder this year.

Keeping track of my mileage is the worst.  This year I did a better job, but still missed writing down the mileage for my stock signings.  Oh well.  I should keep a special notebook in the car and take down the beginning and ending numbers on those trips.  (Betcha I forget to do that!)

No turbo tax for me.  I go to an accountant.  Are you kidding?  The IRS makes authors jump through hoops.  We're self-employed.  We have to pay estimated taxes quarterly.  Schedule C for me!  I supply the numbers, my accountant puts them in his spreadsheet, hits, a button, prints out the tax forms, and the estimated tickets and envelopes, and I'm done for the year.  Unless I make a LOT less or a LOT more and need to adjust my 4th quarter payment, which has happened in the past.

Tax time is not fun time.  But tax time means Spring is on the way.  Hey, I have to find something positive about the experience, don't I?

How about you?  Expecting a refund this year?  (Sadly, I'm not.)

Speaking of covers . . .

One of the great things about being an indie author is that if something isn't working, you can fix it--or at least play with it.  That goes for your title, your book/story description, and covers, too.

One of my favorite short stories hasn't done all that well.  Okay, so it's kind of a romance, but it's got a lot of heart and for a long time I was disappointed that it didn't sell.  Not for lack of trying.  I submitted the story four times and they asked for three rewrites.  But we just couldn't come to an agreement on certain aspects of the story.  In the long run, I'm rather pleased that I have full control over it.  And although it's not a huge seller like say ... oh, I don't know -- A Crafty Killing and The Walled Flower, in the 18 months it's been available, it has earned me more than I would have gotten at 6 cents a word way  back when.

I changed the cover for the 3rd time last year about this time. I also changed the title for the third time.  So you see, this little story has been around the block a few times, trying to find its way and its audience.

The story has done best as "An Unconditional Love."  I liked the image, but it wasn't working.  That cover was kind of done by committee.  I asked for ideas on Facebook and a bunch of readers weighed in. But it was my Cozy Chick sister Heather Webber (also known as Heather Blake) who found the image that was perfect for the story.

DESCRIPTION:  A one-night stand changes Leslie Turner's life forever when she discovers she's pregnant. Keeping the child means losing her business. Even more devastating, the baby is born with a disfiguring birth defect. Her carefully planned life falls apart . . . until years later when she once again meets her baby's father. Can they ever be a family?

Here's a short review by  Dru Ann Love of Dru's Book Musings:  "What happens when your friend's widowed husband comes into your bar and drowns out his sorrow? You drive him home and that one night of unexpected passion changes the course of your life. This was a heartwarming and tender story of one woman's journey of love and forgiveness."

Will this variation of the old cover work?  Who knows.  But it's kind of fun to try.  I might be doing more of it in the near future, too.

So, which cover do you like best?

What's Wrong With This Picture?

My good pal Pat Ryan did a gorgeous cover for my fourth Jeff Resnick book.  Heck, she did gorgeous covers for the whole series.  But for some reason the short story that inspired the book, COLD CASE, outsells the book like crazy, even though there's a commercial FOR the book at the end of the short story.  The short story's picture relates to the opening of the book. The book's cover picture relates to the stunning ending. I love the way the rope (BOUND) is pulling the word "suggestion down."  It's a wonderful cover and one of Pat's favorites.

When Mr. L and I put the cover of Cold Case together, we had a hard time finding the picture.  Neither of us was happy with it, and yet ... apparently it works because that short story outsells the novel by 60%.

That's a HUGE, WHOPPING DIFFERENCE.

I had a discussion with another of my indie publishing pals who's doing quite well.  We looked at my numbers for the whole Jeff Resnick series and had to shake our heads.  Why isn't that puppy finding an audience?  It's got great covers, great reviews, and EVERY WEEK readers write to beg me to finish the next book in the series.   Just not ENOUGH readers.

My friend's analysis:  I need to find that series a new audience. But that's been the problem all along. I don't know WHERE to find that audience.  Clearly a huge chunk my cozy readers aren't interested in trying something a little edgier. Or maybe they're put off by the word "paranormal" thinking it'll involve vampires, werewolves, and/or zombies. 

No.  My stories are and always have been CHARACTER DRIVEN. There's a paranormal element, but it's not a cheap gimmick. It's just part of who Jeff is.

But back to the question of finding that audience.  I've tried.  I've lowered the first book to 99¢.  Heck, I've even given away more than 26,000 copies for free.  I've priced it at $1.99 and I've priced it at $2.99 and $3.99. (It's currently $2.99)  For those who say they will never buy an e reader, the books are available as a trade paperbacks.

What's it going to take for the books of my heart to find an audience?

I sure hope you've got ideas, because I'm fresh out.

Stepping Out Of Lorna's Shadow

"Nothing on earth can make
up for the loss of one who
has loved you."
--Selma Lagert

I lost my Dad in October of 2009, just as Lorna was starting to see some success.  He never knew most of the Lorna triumphs.  Hitting the New York Times bestsellers list--not just the extended list, but the REAL list (so far three times).  He never saw the third book in the series.  He never knew it was nominated for an Agatha for best novel of 2009. He never knew I sold another series under my own name -- the one he gave me.

Yesterday I learned I hit the New York Times bestsellers (extended) list for the first time under my own name for The Walled Flower.  And guess what, I hit higher than Lorna did on her first time. #25.

Yesterday would have been my Dad's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Dad.

And the Blog Tour continues . . .

One of the things that happens around the time an author puts out a new books is ... they're suddenly in demand!

Since The Walled Flower came out last week, I've been all over the place.  Did you miss some of my posts?

They were/are: Feb. 6th  ~ Dru's Book Musings. (Where I talked about Katie's home search.)

Feb. 13th ~ Authors Are People, Too (Interview -- some real oddball questions, which made it fun!)

Feb 15th  ~ Escape with Dollycas Into A Book (Where I talk about bridesmaids)

And Sunday I'll be at Mystery Lovers Kitchen with a great new recipe!

See you there!

To Celebrate Valentine's Day ....

First off, Happy Valentine's Day!

May you and the one you love have a wonderful, sweet, day.  Mr. L and I always celebrate with a Valentine's tea.  This year will be no different.  I'll make the scones, the dainty sandwiches, and haul out the good silver and dishes--while he gets to eat the bounty.  : )

In case you've got extra time on your hands today, maybe you'd like to check out Lauren Royal's blog AUTHORS ARE PEOPLE, TOO.  Here's an interview where there's no talk of writing--just oddball stuff that authors do.  Lauren thought some of my answers were pretty oddball indeed.  Maybe you will, too.  Check it out.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Pet Peeve Thursday: Bruised Fruit

By Guest Blogger Lucy Arlington (aka Sylvia May)

I love fruit. Apples, oranges, bananas, berries, pears, kiwis--you name it, I love every kind.  But I’m persnickety about when they’re at their best. Take bananas, for instance. I prefer them just on the edge of ripeness. Not so green and hard that they feel funny on your teeth, but firm enough that someone like my hubby might say, “This banana is not quite ripe.” But any riper and I find it too mushy with too strong a flavour. Another example is my favourite apple, the Golden Delicious, which, in my opinion, is at its best when it’s still a tad on the green side. More yellow and it tastes too mealy to me. And, oh, pears are so wonderful when they’re crunchy!

Considering how finicky I am with regard to my fruit, you can easily imagine how I might be choosy about selecting the ones I bring home. At the market, I carefully look for a bunch of bananas at just the right state of green-ness, I press gently into apples and pears to see that they’re hard enough, I sniff and knock on melons.

Making sure they are carefully packed into my reusable bags, I set the bags carefully into the trunk of my car and at home I gently place them on the kitchen counter. Still, when I take out my bunch of perfect bananas, there, right along the edge of the curve, is a brown spot. And some of my pears have dents in them.

Does that bother you too? The damage inflicted on fruit as it is transported from the grocer’s shelf to your kitchen? How do we avoid that? We can hardly keep a supply of bubble wrap in our reusable grocery bags!

So I put up with the odd bruise and eat my slightly injured perfect-to-me fruit anyway, savouring its deliciousness. Life is like that too, isn’t it? We put up with a few bruises along the way but savour it nonetheless.

-------------------

Lucy Arlington is the nom de plume for the writing team of Sylvia May and Ellery Adams. As an amalgamated personality, she is an avid reader, cook, and gardener. If she had her way, she'd divide her time between preparing delectables in her kitchen, traveling the globe on her scooter, and sitting in a comfortable chair with a cup of coffee and a paperback until her legs cramped. Lucy is devoted to her husband and children - especially when they ply her with chocolate and gift cards to bookstores. 
Lucy's first novel, "Buried in a Book," a Novel Idea Mystery, had just been released.visit her website at www.lucyarlington.com.

Sylvia May is the author of The Unraveling of Abby Settel. Visit her website at www.sylviamay.com.

Ellery Adams is the author of Books By the Bay Mysteries and upcoming Charmed Pie Mysteries. Visit her website at www.elleryadamsmysteries.com.

And another few books you should try . . .

Oops -- in my excitement in announcing that The Walled Flower was now available, I forgot to mention that my pal Lucy Arlington has a new release as well.  It's Buried in a Book.

See if this tickles your fancy (I know it tickled mine -- I preordered it for my Kindle):

After losing her job as a journalist at the age of forty-five, Lila Wilkins accepts an internship at A Novel Idea, a thriving literary agency in North Carolina. Being paid to read seems perfect to Lila, although it's difficult with the cast of quirky co-workers and piles of query letters. But when a penniless aspiring author drops dead in the agency's waiting room--and Lila discovers a series of threatening letters--she's determined to find out who wrote him off.

Okay, I happen to know the author (and love her work) so I know I'm going to enjoy it.

You can get it from:  Amazon ~ Kindle ~ Barnes & Noble ~ Nook ~ Books A Million ~ Indigo ~ The Book Depository ~ iTunes ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

And don't forget my pal E.J. Copperman's latest in the Haunted Guesthouse mystery series:  Old Haunts

The ghosts haunting Alison Kerby's Jersey Shore guesthouse are sad. Maxie wants to know who murdered her ex-husband, and Paul pines for his still-living almost-fiancee. The only one who isn't missing her ex is Alison-because The Swine just arrived on her doorstep...

Amazon ~ Kindle ~ Barnes & Noble ~ Nook ~ Books A Million ~ Indigo ~ The Book Depository ~ iTunes ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

 

And Clobbered by Camembert by Avery Aames, the third Cheese shop Mystery,

Cheese store owner Charlotte Bessette is setting up for the town's Winter Wonderland fair. Then, when an old friend is found dead in the cottage of Charlotte's assistant Rebecca, a suspicion falls on Rebecca's boyfriend, a honeybee farmer. While the town buzzes with gossip, can Charlotte catch the culprit without getting stung herself?

Amazon ~ Kindle  ~  Barnes & Noble ~ Nook  ~  Books A Million  ~  Indigo  ~ The Book Depository  ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

Happy Book Day To Me!

Throw the confetti high, because the second Victoria Square Mystery is officially released today!

And just where can you get the book?  Why, click any of the links below.

Amazon ~ Kindle

Barnes & Noble ~ Nook

Books A Million

Indigo

The Book Depository

Independent (US) Bookstores

iTunes

 

 

I'm REALLY proud of this book.  If you intend to buy it, please do so this week.  If it hits the NYTimes bestsellers list, there's a chance Lorna's readers might find out we're one and the same author.  (And maybe one day the publisher will make my name large enough to be seen without a magnifying glass. <g>)

In any case, thank you all, my wonderful readers, for your letters, support, and most of all for reading my books.  You're the best!

You'll have to pry this book out of my dead hands ... or not

By guest blogger E.J. Copperman

I don't often deny my daughter, now a sophomore in college, much of anything I can afford to give her. For one thing, she doesn't want all that much, and for another, she's my daughter. So she was surprised when I told her she couldn't have the copy of my new book I had just handed her for inspection.

"But I haven't read this one yet," she protested. "Why won't you let me read it?"

I told her I was perfectly happy for her to read OLD HAUNTS, the third in the Haunted Guesthouse mystery series. In fact, i'd have been disappointed if she didn't want to read it, as I truly value her opinion (especially since she loved the first two books in the series--the girl has good taste). But I remained adamant; she couldn't have that book.

I have a few rules I apply to myself. I always skip the second step when climbing stairs (don't ask me why--I'm pretty sure even I don't understand that one). I always put on my socks before anything else in the morning. (TMI?) I always cross off the "Down" clues on the New York Times crossword puzzle as I decipher the answers, but not the "Across" ones.

And I always--always--keep the first copy of one of my books for myself, and nobody else.

There's something about that first copy, the one the publisher sends an author before the number of copies for "promotional purposes" they send because it's stipulated in the contract we sign. It's a reminder that this was a dream job, something I aspired to for years and years before gathering the nerve to even try it. It brings me back to the first copy of the first book I wrote, the way I felt when I was holding it in my hands for the first time. That's a sensation that doesn't get old. It represents effort and luck and joy and hope and a thousand other things I can't necessarily articulate.

And it's a feeling that doesn't ever go away.

So on a shelf in my office is the first copy I received of each of my books, in any edition and all configurations (large print, etc.). As the shelf becomes more crowded, it becomes a source of pride and memory. It's the kind of thing that strokes an author's ego for the right reason; it's not about money (because the money actually would take up less room on the shelf, even in singles), it's not about "fame," however incongruous a term that is for what we do. It's not about being lucky that an editor liked your writing and took the time to read your book when she could have read someone else's. It's not about beating out another writer for a space on that shelf; competition in this business is a ridiculous concept; we're all in it together.

Seeing those books, those first books, is a reminder that it took hard work to get there, and that other people helped along the way. It's a feeling of real gratitude and pride, and I look at that shelf every once in a while when things are going other than great, to remind myself that maybe I don't have it so bad after all.

So I'm sorry, honey, but you can't have that book. Instead, I'll pre-order one from a bookseller and have it sent to your college P.O. box.

You don't ever turn away an interested reader. I'm not crazy.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
 E.J. Copperman is the author of the Haunted Guesthouse mystery series, which continues Feb. 7 (Hey, that's tomorrow!) with OLD HAUNTS.

The ghosts haunting Alison Kerby's Jersey Shore guesthouse are sad. Maxie wants to know who murdered her ex-husband, and Paul pines for his still-living almost-fiancee. The only one who isn't missing her ex is Alison-because The Swine just arrived on her doorstep...

Available from:

Amazon ~ Kindle ~ Barnes & Noble ~ Nook ~ Books A Million ~ Indigo ~ The Book Depository ~ iTunes ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

You can find out more about E.J. at www.ejcopperman.com

Pet Peeve Thursday ... ON FRIDAY!

by guest blogger Avery Aames

I’m sure someone has already groused about this already, but standing in line at the grocery store…  How is it possible that no matter what line I choose, it’s the longest? It  might look like the shortest, but lo and behold, it is not. I pull up my cart of a modest amount and start unloading, and the woman who has three things in her cart…can’t find her credit card…needs one more thing from the back of the store…the bag person decides he must help the other customer…the checker has to check the price on one of the items.  It never fails.  And then to make matters worse, the aisle next door opens up, but I’ve already laid out my things on the belt, and there isn’t a prayer in heaven that I can get those items into my basket and charge to the next line before someone—luckier than I—gets there first! 

And don’t get me started about the self-check line. Sure, it works and can be great for moving fast unless you accidentally don’t place something in the bagging area in the allotted time, and then you need to have an attendant help you…except there are no attendants to be found!

What’s bugging you today?

======================

Avery Aames who has a new CHEESE SHOP MYSTERY coming out Tuesday, February 7, CLOBBERED BY CAMEMBERT! 

Cheese store owner Charlotte Bessette is setting up for the town's Winter Wonderland fair. Then, when an old friend is found dead in the cottage of Charlotte's assistant Rebecca, a suspicion falls on Rebecca's boyfriend, a honeybee farmer. While the town buzzes with gossip, can Charlotte catch the culprit without getting stung herself?

Amazon ~ Kindle  ~  Barnes & Noble ~ Nook  ~  Books A Million  ~  Indigo  ~ The Book Depository  ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

Pet Peeve Thursday: Telephone Trees

by guest blogger Nancy J. Cohen

How often have you tried to reach customer service on the telephone only to be transported through multiple levels of automated replies? Not only does this take up your time, but it raises your aggravation factor tenfold. 

“Just give me a person,” you shout into the phone to no avail.

When that doesn’t work, you punch the “O” on your keypad. Instead of bringing up the operator, you get a message that says, “I’m sorry, I don’t recognize that response.” And the litany of automated choices begins again.

A while ago, I came across a post online that mentioned a website called http://gethuman.com. This useful site lists companies with instructions on how to bypass their telephone tree.

A miracle!

Of course, every time I want to call someone, I’m not going to look up this website, scroll down to the company, and read the instructions. Too much rigmarole. But the site does give some general tips that may be useful. For example, repeatedly say “Customer Service” or “Representative”, and you might get connected to a live person. Or push the zero key. As mentioned above, though, this may not get you the operator, in which case the automated choices are read to you again.

It’s just so annoying when we have to talk to a machine these days instead of a person. Trying to get hold of someone in your doctor’s office is probably the worst. You end up leaving a message, and if you’re lucky, you might get a call back by dinner time. The cable company? Forget it. We’d finally reached tech service and scheduled an appointment. The night before, we received an automated phone call that said the problem in the area had been fixed and our appointment was canceled. What problem in the area? I had to call up all over again and reschedule, then wait for two more automated confirmation phone calls.

Give me back the old days when real people answered the telephone.
====================================
Nancy J. Cohen is an award-winning author who writes romance and mysteries. Her popular Bad Hair Day series features hairdresser Marla Shore, who solves crimes with wit and style under the sultry Florida sun. Here latest entry in the series is Shear Murder:  Who knew weddings could be murder?  Hairstylist Marla Shore is weeks away from becoming a bride herself when she walks down the aisle as a bridesmaid at her friend Jill’s ceremony. Things take a turn for the worse when the matron of honor ends up dead, the cake knife in her chest. Now what will they use to cut the cake? BUY NOW!

Follow Nancy on her Social Networks: Website   ~ Blog ~ Twitter ~ Facebook ~ Goodreads

Leave a comment during Nancy’s blog tour and enter to win a free signed book.
 

Got balls? (Dryer, that is.)

Okay, so I've been seeing these dryer balls in the grocery store for months and I wondered ... do they really work?

Okay, I'm looking to stop using any kind of chemicals I can ... but I also wonder if it is bad to have plastic balls in your dryer getting HOT and possibly giving off chemicals that you're trying to avoid by using them.

Does anybody know?

Does anybody use them?  If so, do you like them?

Thousands want to know!

My glamous boots -- NOT!

Winter's here, and I've got boots.

For many years (more than a decade), I couldn't say that.  Why?  Because I couldn't find any boots I liked.  Okay, I'll admit it. My last pair of boots leaked like sieves and I figured I may as well just wear my sneakers and have wet feet anyway.  But this year ... I decided to bite the bullet.

I'm no clothes horse.  I've had fashionable boots in the past.  Not only did they leak, but they hurt my feet.  This year, my mother saw a pair of Totes boots she liked at JCPenney, but they didn't have her size, so I ordered them for her online.  As it happens, we wear the same size shoe, so when her boots came, I tried them on, and--Whoa--they fit perfectly. Even better, they weren't super expensive.  I went straight home and ordered a pair for myself.

What a difference.  Unlike my sneakers, they're WARM.  So far my feet have stayed dry.  I can shovel and not have Popsicle toes.  I am a happy camper!

It's true, they are NOT glamorous, but so what?  I want warm, dry feet and they deliver.  Now to hope they last more than one season without leaking.

Are you a fashion hound when it comes to boots, or do you just want dry feet?

The Shoe Goddess

by guest blogger Janet Bolin
 
My mystery-writing career began when someone lost a shoe.

I found it.

To the consternation of the woman walking with me, I shoved the shoe into my briefcase and took it home.

The next morning, I took the shoe to work and called my doctor.

Are you still with me? Oh, sorry, that was rather a large . . . um . . . step.

Okay, here’s how the conversation went, sort of.

Me: “Have any of your patients reported losing an orthotic?”
Receptionist: “No.”

Me: “Because I found one. It matches my orthotic.”

Receptionist: “Is it yours?”

Me: “No. The sticker on the bottom of mine says Bolin. The sticker on the bottom of hers is torn, but these are the letters I can read. T-E-N-A.”

Receptionist: “First or last name?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

Silence.

Me: (getting desperate—as anyone who has ever purchased orthotics knows, they are hideously expensive.) “It’s in a blue suede woman’s shoe, size 8M.”

More silence. Then, with a great deal of doubt, “I’ll see if we have any patients matching that.” Click. Dial tone.

My sense of triumph lasted at least an hour. But day after day passed, and I didn’t hear from the doctor’s office. Some poor woman had lost an expensive item, and could be hobbling around on very sore feet. On one very sore foot.

What could have possibly happened to her? Maybe something terrible.  
  
I started to write about a woman setting out to find the owner of a lost shoe.  I scribbled and scribbled (actually, I keyed the words, but scribbling sounds much more dramatic) and couldn’t stop.

Finally, I received a call. “I hear you found my shoe.”

Tena showed up at my office to collect her shoe and her expensive orthotic. She brought me a HUGE chocolate chip cookie in the shape of a high-heeled shoe. “The people in my office are calling you the Shoe Goddess,” she said.

Breaking off and gobbling chunks of cookie, the people in my office probably started thinking of me as the Chocolate Chip Cookie Goddess.

We all lived happily ever after.

All of us, that is, except for the woman in my story who lost a shoe . . .

That was my first manuscript, the one that lives in the proverbial drawer. But I was hooked on writing mysteries.

What about you? Did you ever do something strange that propelled you into accomplishing something you’d always wanted to try?

<><><><><><><><><><><><>

The first book in Janet Bolin’s Threadville Mystery series is Dire Threads. Visit her website or talk to her on Facebook and/or Twitter.  The second book in the series is Threaded for Trouble, arriving in stores June 5, 2012, and is now available for pre-order.

Dire Threads:  Amazon ~ Kindle   ~ Barnes & Noble / Nook   ~  Indigo   ~  Books A Million   ~  The Book Depository    ~  Independent (US) Bookstores

Threaded For Trouble:  Amazon   ~  Barnes & Noble   ~  The Book Depository   ~   Books A Million  ~ Independent (US) Bookstores

Even I can look trendy!

Well, it's about time I spiffed up.  I mean, I do have a book signing to go to in a couple off week.  (I'll be signing The Walled Flower.  If you're in the Rochester, NY area -- maybe you can come and say "HI!") 

Now, I hate to dress up, but in the past couple of months, I've invested in several scarves. I have a really pretty purple and gold one (it shimmers), silver, a black-and-white floral.  I even have a few knitted ones. (The one I made myself convinced me that my knitting days are over, thank you very little Mr. Carpal Tunnel syndrome.)

But what do I know about wearing them?  Well, isn't Google just the best thing around.  I found a video to help me out.  (Although, come on -- NOT choice No. 3.  The woman looks like she's trying out to be the bow on a Valentine's Day gift.)

 

So far I've successfully worn one of my scarves once. I mean, I went to a party and nobody laughed. In fact, a couple of other women were wearing very nice scarves. I felt like I belonged (and believe me, that doesn't happen very often).

Do you wear scares to spiff up?

My New Favorite Movie

Okay, over the years I've had a LOT of favorite movies.  And now I have a new one.

Okay, I still have LOTS of favorite movies that I watch depending on my mood.  Sometimes I watch Star Trek: The Search For Spock, because if there was ever a story that explores the depths of friendship, that's it.  I love Star Trek First Contact because we see Captain Picard pushed to the brink, and yet . . . he's still every bit a hero. 

I watch Pollyanna when I have a long and boring task (because it's incredibly LONG and Hayley Mills is charming).  I also love The Secret Garden. (I usually read the book a couple of times a year, too.)

I love White Christmas and hate Betty Haines every time I watch it.  But I still watch it.  Wayyyyy too many times when Christmas rolls around.  (Why didn't she just ask Bob what he was up to?  Nooooo, that would have shortened the story by about twenty minutes.  But she wouldn't have looked like such a jerk.)

But lately I've been watching Love Actually (when I can tear myself away from my latest manuscript.  I admit, I did watch it at least four times in December ... not all that much, really.)  It's such a cool movie, with so many different looks at what makes love.  People in love.  People out of love.  People wanting love.  Peopel denying themselves of love.  And though it's set at Christmastime, it doesn't have to be Christmas to enjoy it. And, for most of the couples, it has a happy ending.  (Come on, sometimes you really just want to see  happy ending.)

What's your current favorite movie?

An embarrassing monogram

Last week I went to the Lands End Inlet (as opposed to outlet) store.  Way cool!  I was on a mission:  to buy one of their wonderful tote bags.  I thought it would be a great way to carry stuff to and fro this summer when we go to the cottage.  (Can you tell I'm already counting the days until we can start going down there again?)

So we drove across town and go into the store.  I asked one of the clerks where to find them. She said against the wall, but if we didn't mind monogrammed ones, they were on sale.

She wasn't kidding.  The monogrammed ones -- I assume ones that were ordered but for some reason never purchased, or perhaps they were monogrammed incorrectly -- were drastically cheaper.  As a former vendor in an antiques co-op, it pains me to pay retail for anything, so getting a bargain was a good deal for me.

I picked through the bags (and boy, were there a lot of them) and found the perfect one.  It was white with pink accents with a monogram of HCO.  Not only that, but there are cool pockets inside, and it zippered shut.  Can you say "almost perfect in every way?"

When I went to pay for it, the clerk said I would get an extra 20% off.  Even better!  As she cashed out my purchase, she asked if I was interested in removing the monogram.  I was.  So she put in a sheet of instructions on what to do.  Ya know what, I actually read the thing for helpful hints! 

I got home, borrowed a seam ripper from my mother, took out a pair of fine tweezers and went to work.  First, I went after the BIG C in the middle.  Whoa--this was a lot harder than it looked.  I had to get out Mr. L's head loupe because the stitches were very tiny and my close-range eyesight has never been all that good.  After quite a long time, I managed to pick out all of the letter C.  As far as I was concerned, that was enough.  Until I realized what the remaining letters spelled.

Can you say "HO!"

NO, I did NOT want to be known as a HO -- but oy!  The "O" was pretty easy, but it took forever to pick out that H, which had a lot of curlicues. Afterwards, I followed the instructions, which said to use a little liquid Ivory Snow and gently wash the area with a toothbrush and it would help hide the offending letters. (Lucky I had some on hand.)  I did, and it did! Now I have a lovely tote and without someone else's monogram or an offensive term written on it.

What was your last great bargain?

If I had unlimited income . . . .

Recently one of my ex-co-workers responded to a Facebook post where I talked about the upcoming release of The Walled Flower.  (okay, can you blame me?  It's one of my favorite topics right about now.)  In it she said, "I know somebody famous."

Wait a minute.  Me, famous?

No, no, no.

I'm not even a celebrity (and when you consider that people like Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian get to be celebrities by appearing in sex videos -- no thanks, that's not the life I'm looking for).

Let's face it, even in my Lorna Barrett persona (my best known name), I couldn't walk into a Starbucks in Rochester, NY and get a free cup of Joe by pulling the fame card.  "Who?" they say, squinting at me and taking in my faded jeans (they got that way by years of wear, not by paying an exorbitant price.  And besides, I don't drink coffee.)

I've always heard it's better to be rich than famous.  I think that must be true, but about now, I'm wondering how to get to the rich part.

And if I was rich, what would I do with all that money? 

Well, first off, I'd get a brand spanking new kitchen.  I have a TINY kitchen (and worry that future prospective buyers will bolt when they find out it's so tiny there's no room for even a bistro table and chairs), but I don't even want granite counters, and stainless steel appliances.  Nope, just some new counters (Formica is fine with me) and reface the cabinets.  Oh, and replace the slippery-when-wet ceramic tile with one that has a little texture.

A new car.  Not a Caddy or even a BMW ... nope.  A Town and County minivan with stow-and-go seats.  Don't even need extra BRDs (beverage restraint devices) because I use both hands to drive (and, as mentioned above, I don't drink coffee). 

I could give more money to charity if I had more to spare.  My favorite charities are:  Crackerbox Palace farm animal rescue (a lot of people see farm animals as expendible.  Well, I don't. They deserve a long and happy life just like cats and dogs), The Wayne County Humane Society (I'd give to the one in my own county, only they are well funded--Wayne County has a lot of poverty, and not enough $$$ to spay and neuter, etc.) and St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital (although I'd feel a lot more comfortable giving them more money if they laid off sending stuff out like stickers and calendars and stuff and just used the money I send to CURE KIDS OF CANCER!!!!!).  I'd also give more to my local Food Pantry. 

Okay, I MIGHT buy a few bracelets and earrings, and a couple of 1950s Christmas figurines that cost more than a buck each (my garage sale limit).  But other than that . . . .

What would you buy if you had unlimited funds?

Inching up my stats

I have counters on the index (home) pages of my websites (and even on this blog).  That way I can see how many people come to visit on a daily/weekly basis.

It's no surprise that my Lorna website gets the most hits, and it's pretty steady.  (That's unique visitors.)  I sure wish it was more, but I'll take what I can get.

Unfortunately, my other two personas don't get those kinds of hits.  It's discouraging to me, because I've been shouting from any rooftop I can find that I'm writing under three names.  Lorraine's site is doing eh-okay.  L.L.'s site ... you don't want to know.  This pie chart isn't accurate, but it's not too far off, either.

This is rather discouraging.  Especially since Lorraine has a new book coming out Februray 7th.

I put my website address on all my promotional material.  I list them in the acknowledgments in all my books.  I would expect that more people would seek the sites out. 

Do you think the golden age of websites is over?  What do you like to see in an author's website?

(Just in case you want to visit my websites to compare them, you can find them by clicking my various names:  Lorna ~ Lorraine ~ L.L. )

Winter's ugly return

Here in Western NY, we've been enjoying November for the past three months.  I'm sure other parts of the Northeast have, too.   It's been great.  I mean, I can't remember such a wonderful winter.  A winter with virtually no snow.

Last year was the pits.  It seemed like it snowed every day. I was out there with my roof rake just about every day, and snowblowing the top of the driveway, too.  (We have an "L" shaped driveway.) Over the summer, we had our landscaping redone.  Weeeee!  Suddenly without all that overgrown stuff lining the drive, the plowman can get in and plow the L-shaped top of the drive.  But oddly enough ... he's only had to do it once.

Until today.

Winter has suddenly reappeared.  BAH!  Humbug.

I was quite prepared to go straight through until May with November weather and now ... it's all been ruined.

I'm sure that a few weeks from now Punxsutawney Phil pops out of his hole on February 2nd, you just KNOW he's going to way SIX MORE WEEKS OF WINTER.  I'm just afraid he'll say TWELVE more weeks of winter because we've skirted the issue for so long.

How's winter been where you live?